listening to stuck in my head: that “what’s this” song from the nightmare before christmas. i need to get the soundtrack for that.

craving: another couple of days in bed, hot tea, and someone to clean the rest of my apartment for me

last night: i stayed home yesterday, which meant that i didn’t really do anything. i read most of the latest issue of granta, which apparently i still have a subscription to as there was a copy of it waiting for me in massachusetts. i dozed off a few times, straightened up the apartment a bit, talked to people, went to bed.

estimated hours of sleep: i have no idea

so far today: i really didn’t want to come to work today; i don’t really feel any better, but i can’t afford to miss another day without pay. i get paid sick days starting at six months, and i’ve only been here about four and a half months. i fell asleep on the train listening to peter murphy.

current plans for later today: after i get through the day here, i’m going to go visit james at hmv because i haven’t seen him in over a week. i talked to him yesterday, which was cool because neither of us is exactly easy to contact lately. if my check has cleared, which i doubt it has, i’m going to go do some apartment shopping at bed bath & beyond or something. i still need a bunch of stuff, practical and decorative.

what else: hee. i just logged into my old hotmail account for the first time in months and i’m reading through some of the stuff that’s still sitting in my inbox… mostly emails i got after being gbotw back in november. it’s highly amusing. i might post some of this stuff somewhere.

listening to: depeche mode - violator

craving: soup and saltines

last night: well, i called around yesterday and found out that my nyu health insurance is still good until august 20th, which is like sunday or something. woo. so no emergency room for me. i left work early and went over to the health center, where they diagnosed me with some unidentified ‘bacterial tonsilitis’. apparently it has all the symptoms of strep, and it’s related to strep, but it’s not strep. whatever - they gave me penicillin and a gatorade [i was dehydrated, apparently] and told me to get some rest and that if i take the penicillin i should be better in a couple of days. hurrah.

estimated hours of sleep: nineish

so far today: i decided not to go to work today, because i’m still contagious and i feel like hell. i figure i’ll stay in bed and let the antibiotics do their thing for a day, then go back to work tomorrow. i probably won’t get paid for today, but that’s okay. i figure it’ll be worse if i go in and don’t get better for a week or something.

current plans for later today: i don’t have any soup, but at least i can sleep. and i intend to sleep all day.

what else: i’m arranging to get health insurance through my company for when my nyu insurance runs out. it’s going to cost a bundle, but it’ll cost a lot more if i get sick or something and i have to pay for it myself.

listening to stuck in my head: peter murphy: deep

craving: the end of the week so i can go to the doctor and then just sleep

last night: i’ve been slowly starting to feel like hell over the past few days - i think i’ve caught strep here at work. i’m incredibly susceptible to it for some reason - i used to get it at least once a year in high school. i hate strep. it’s one of the diseases that i can’t just make go away by sleeping and drugging myself up - you have to actually go get a prescription and take your amoxicillin or penicillin or whatever. it’s such a pain. i can’t afford to miss any work right now because i need the money, so i can’t go to the doctor till friday or saturday, and since i don’t have health insurance it’s probably going to end up that i’ll go get a throat culture at the emergency room on saturday and pay for the whole damn thing myself. blah. my immune system sucks. it feels like i only just got over having mono.

estimated hours of sleep: sevenish

so far today: my throat is killing me - not in that scratchy, sore-throat way, but in the way it did when i had mono. my tonsils are absurdly swollen, as are my lymph nodes, and swallowing is less than pleasant. i’m taking ibuprofen just so i can swallow without cringing.

current plans for later today: this is either strep or a mono relapse. i think it’s been long enough that it would be unlikely to be a mono relapse, but the symptoms are all there. i can’t decide which is preferable - mono will go away on its own, but strep will go away faster, even though you have to get treatment for it.

what else: did i mention that i hate being sick and not having health insurance? it’s another part of supporting myself, i suppose. but supporting myself is a lot more fun when i’m well enough to enjoy it - it’s times like these i wouldn’t really mind having someone around to tuck me in and bring me soup.

listening to stuck in my head: depeche mode - sweetest perfection

craving: health insurance. yes, health insurance.

last night over the weekend:
so i went to visit my parents over the weekend, in massachusetts. i’d been putting it off for a while so it was good to finally go. getting there on friday turned into quite the bitch, though. i had a reseveration on the 8:00 us airways shuttle, so my plan was to get there around seven thirty, hop on the plane, and be in boston around nine. friday, however, there wasn’t the best weather for flying. they ended up cancelling the two shuttles right before mine, meaning that three shuttles-full of people were trying to get on one plane. i barely made it on, since it was open seating and the people from the earlier flights got to board first. then we sat on the runway for over an hour and a half. i didn’t end up getting to boston till nearly eleven. bleh.

saturay was the only full day i spent in massachusetts. i went to go visit my grandparents in the morning - my grandfather just got out of the hospital recently, and i hadn’t seen either of them in months so it was good to see them again. i might go back around labor day because my cousins and everyone will be home so we can all get together. later that afternoon, i went sailing with my parents, which was probably the highlight of my weekend. my father was a shipbuilder for years, as were seven generations of my family before him, and sailing was a huge part of my childhood. i hadn’t been out on the water all summer, though, so it was great to go out again.

the weather on saturday was beautiful, as it has been for the past few days - cool, with heavy grey clouds and the slightest hint of impending rain. the wind was perfect. my mother didn’t like it much - she prefers sun - but my dad and i loved it. there weren’t many other people out on the water because of the clouds and it being a bit chilly, though the wind was perfect. i dug out a pair of my old cargo pants from high school, since the only pants i brought home with me were the black khakis i wore to work on friday and i didn’t want to get them salty. lying in the cockpit in my old pants and an old bauhaus shirt, my shoes left at the house, i stared at the sky and felt like i was fifteen again, but in a good way.

sunday morning i slept late. my mother made blueberry pancakes and soy sausages [they still don't really dig me being a vegetarian, but they like soy sausages] and drove me to the airport. the shuttle home went much more smoothly and i got home around three thirty, at which point i took a nap.

estimated hours of sleep: last night? not so many. i stayed up talking in #altgothic for a while. over the weekend, though, i got plenty of sleep… my parents house and the surrounding area is so quiet. it was strange falling asleep without the sound of cars and the subway and all the other background noise i get at my apartment in brooklyn. but it was good.

so far today: nothing special. i noticed as i was getting dressed that my house is more disastrously messy than it’s been in a while, what with my packing frenzy friday morning and whatnot. i think i’d better clean tonight.

current plans for later today: nothing in particular, which is fine.

listening to stuck in my head: covenant - dead stars

craving: the ability to change the matrix as i see fit

last night: i finally made it to long black veil; i missed i think three weeks in a row. the new space is decent - not as good as mother was, of course, but that’s only to be expected, i suppose. my biggest complaints about the event since it reopened at true [the new space] are not really venue-related - i hate how they’ve imported a chunk of click + drag into lbv. they’ve now got dj saint james from click - i think he calls himself down boy or something now - who just has remarkably awful taste in music. i mean really, the boy needs to lay off the crack or go spin at a non-goth night. the other thing that i disliked was the fact that lbv now has the cocktail waitress from click. she’s this really incredibly pushy drag queen who has pissed me off i believe every single time i’ve been to click, and now it looks like she’s at lbv too. basically, the idea is to get people to drink more by having her go around and get drinks for people. which is fine. except that the way it turns out is that if you’re sitting somewhere without a drink in your hand you get harrassed to no end by this bitch. once, spencer and i went to click at mother, and we were sitting in the versailles room, sharing a chair because there wasn’t much seating. i got up to go to the bathroom and when i came back, spencer was standing in a corner. i asked him why he’d given up the chair, and he said that the cocktail waitress had come over and asked if he wanted a drink; spencer doesn’t drink, so he said no, and she told him “well, then, i need that chair for someone who’s going to drink.” then last night, she’d already asked me if i wanted a drink like four times, so i finally decided to have something just to shut her up. now, when i drink, i’ll usually have about three drinks a night, more if you include bottled water and such. and i don’t tip the bartender after each one of those; i usually leave a big tip when i’m about to leave for the night instead. and that’s for the bartender, because the bartenders do work really hard and i like the ones at lbv. so the cocktail waitress comes back with my drink, i ask her how much it is, and give her what she tells me and go back to talking to my friend louis [yay louis! he's so cool.], but she’s still standing there. i ignore her, and she says like really loudly and holding out the money i gave her “what about my tip?” first of all, i wasn’t going to tip her at all because she’s just so damn rude. second of all, when i tip, i tip the bartender and i’ll do it myself, thank you. so i gave her this look and then reeeeeeally slowly pulled out my wallet and gave her another bill. “oh, thanks,” she says, with the most incredibly snotty voice. i just stared at her like i was about to smack her, because i was; i must have looked as pissed off as i was because she left me alone the rest of the night. but anyway. the click people are what i dislike most about lbv, but lbv is still really cool.

i finally got to hang out with louis, yay! he’s so cute. he has this bright red dyed hair, and he was wearing this whole red outfit that matched it perfectly and he looked great. we couldn’t stay at the club till closing because it was a weeknight, but we got there early and sat on one of the couches critiquing people’s style, and i pointed out people i knew and such. we danced a bit, and louis got to meet krystal and obie and venus and everyone, and then we headed out. it was very cool, though i’m a zombie this morning.

estimated hours of sleep: three

so far today: fell asleep on the subway and my internal alarm clock woke me up at 49th street, just as it always does. 49th is just before 63rd, where i usually get off. the problem with it this morning is that the Q is under construction, and in order to get to 63rd you have to change at 34th for a shuttle. so i missed my stop. oh well. i rode it to 57th and walked. i’m so exhausted from last night. at least it’s friday and i get to get out of here early.

current plans for later today: i’m going to massachusetts this evening to visit my parents; i’m coming back on sunday, so this probably won’t get updated tomorrow. i haven’t been home in months, so i really have to go at this point. ah well. i’d just really like to have a weekend to myself.

what else: krystal was adorable last night, as always; she and louis matched because they both had this red-and-black makeup thing going on. it was cute.

listening to stuck in my head: annie lenox - sweet dreams

craving: something caffeinated and something bagelish.

last night: last night was yummy. i stayed at work until nineish, then headed over to krystal’s apartment uptown. it was so good to see her; i hadn’t seen her in weeks and she’s so much fun. she made us dinner - homemade pesto with pasta and tomatoes, and melon afterwords - and we watched the newish version of a midsummer night’s dream. krystal’s so beautiful, it’s amazing. even just sitting around the house, not even vaguely dressed up or anything, she’s stunning. she has these really classical features that make me think of ancient greek goddesses.

getting home was rather hellish. i had expected to just take the 6 from krystal’s to the D at bleecker and from there go straight home, but it didn’t really work out that way. the 6 decided to go express, meaning that it didn’t stop at bleecker. so i revised my plan and figured i’d get off the 6 at union square [which, a few months ago, would have been the end of my journey - i really miss living in manhattan], then take the N uptown a few stops to 34th, where i would change for the D. the N took forever to show up, but it finally did, and i managed not to fall asleep and miss 34th street. what i’d forgotten, however, is that there is no downtown D service from 34th street late night, and by this time it was after one am, which qualifies. i waited for about half an hour before i realized that there was no D coming. so i waited for a downtown F, which i took to west 4th street, where i waited again for, at last, a downtown D. i got home just before three am, set my alarm for six thirty, and collapsed.

estimated hours of sleep: i don’t even want to begin to think about it.

so far today: it’s rather nice out, but i’m stuck inside. blah. i was late to work.

current plans for later today: louis is in the city, so we’re going to go to long black veil tonight, as far as i know.

what else: all the subway hell was worth it, though. it was good to see krystal again.

listening to stuck in my head: funker vogt - gunman

craving: bagels. mmm.

last night: stayed here until seven or seven thirty with spencer, then went home. talked to draven and krystal for a while and stopped breifly in #nin… i feel like i’ve outgrown that place. everytime i go i remember why i don’t go. went to #altgothic for a bit, then read until i fell asleep. damn, it was hot yesterday.

estimated hours of sleep: sixish

so far today: it was a little less hot this morning, and really beautiful out - all overcast and drizzly. it reminded me of when i went to ireland a few years ago. it was still too muggy, though. it needs to be a little cooler.

current plans for later today: i’m seeing krystal tonight… i’m going over to her place around nine, which is cool. so i probably won’t get any sleep tonight. also, louis is in the city at this point so i might see him briefly today; if not, we’re going to long black veil tomorrow so that should be fun.

what else: um……. yes.

listening to: funker vogt - execution tracks

craving: more oj. i just finished mine.

last night over the weekend: yeesh. i haven’t updated all weekend. i’m bad.

so saturday i was going to go meet james2 for coffee at noon, but i ended up rescheduling for sunday cause i was so tired. i slept until around one, then talked to draven and read for a while. spencer came over around four. we got italian and went to visit his grandmother, and then just lazed around my place till nine or ten. i stayed up reading till about midnight, then went to sleep.

sunday i got up at a reasonable hour for a change and met james2 in manhattan. we went to caffe reggio, which i love. their coffee is wonderful, and their omelettes divine. james2 and i wandered around for a while, then i went home. some russian guy in my neighborhood actually tried to beat me up because i gave him the finger when he made some obsence comment on my appearance. i smacked him and his friend made him leave. heh. draven came over at five to watch the messenger with me. draven is yum.

estimated hours of sleep: i don’t want to try to count; it’ll only depress me.

so far today: i’m in a good mood. and i was early for work. and that’s all i’m going to say.

current plans for later today: i have absolutely no idea. i need sleep, that’s about as far as i’ve gotten in the planning stages.

what else: oj is good.

listening to: typing

craving: i definitely need more sleep. i’d also dig some decent coffee right now. the office stuff is rather mediocre today.

last night: i saw james yesterday. that was cool; i hadn’t seen him in a while and i missed him. we went to caffe reggio and had really good pasta. i like that place. i’m going back on sunday with the other james. i suppose i’ll have to call the other james something else. james2. after caffe reggio, we went to generation records, which is not somewhere to go if you don’t have any money because they always have all the music and such i’ve been meaning to buy. i bought my nightmare before xmas shirt [which you can see here] there, too. it reminds me a little of newbury comics in boston, but it’s cooler.

estimated hours of sleep: five or so

so far today: i was supposed to get up at six fifteen today. i ended up getting up at seven thirty, which is usually when i leave the house. bleh.

current plans for later today: too much to think about. at least it’s friday, though.

what else: aggggh. sleepy i am.

listening to: switchblade symphony - the three calamities

craving: a bagel from bagel buffet on sixth avenue. apart from avenue z bagels in brooklyn, bagel buffet has the best bagels ever.

last night: went home and got the spiciest indian food i’ve ever had… there’s this great place near me that’s open 24 hours and i can get enough for two meals for myself for three dollars. but damn, that stuff is hot. the pakora left my mouth on fire.

then i took a bath. i haven’t taken a bath in like ten years. but my tub was all sparkly clean from when i scrubbed it the other day, so i figured why not. it was pretty relaxing, but my hair took forever to dry. i talked to a bunch of people and went to bed entirely too late.

estimated hours of sleep: fiveish. bleh.

so far today: when my alarm went off, i reluctantly dragged myself out of bed and got dressed, etc. i was still so tired though that i actually bothered setting my alarm again so i could take a seven minute nap before i left.

current plans for later today: james and i spoke on monday or something and made plans for today, but i haven’t talked to him since then so i don’t know if we’re still hanging out. if not, i’ll probably go home and go to bed.

what else: i want my oj, dammit.